We are many selves

Images and fantasies of our future self, believe that we should be or even fear to be; is the driver for change. All with different baggage stemming from self, family or spouse.

However the most important thing is get out of our head. To ACT.

As with this article, almost everyone who's trying to figure out the next career takes a long time to try and figure out the next career. Under normal circumstances, career transition takes 3 years and rarely linear. A few steps forward, then back.

Craft experiments. Shift connections. Make sense of the changes.

We all have our epiphany. I recognised mine as the 19 hours flight back from Boston (the plane which broke down and I had to stay over at Chicago for 24 hours). On the plane back to Singapore, I first sat beside a guy who's almost finishing his grad school, and then later, after transiting at Hong Kong, I sat beside a professor from UC Berkeley.

Everything takes time, perseverance and hard work. But pray, do start. Start by taking action on the road to Damascus.

Napolean Hill: Laws to Success

1. Definite major purpose - this means having your heart fixed on what you want and not abandoning that purpose due to temporary defeat.

2. Mastermind alliance - gathering two or more individuals to help you achieve your purpose

3. Giving more than asked for - in other words, going the extra mile and providing a better service than you are paid for. Giving opens the door for receiving.

4. Faith - knowing without a doubt everything is working for you to accomplish your definite purpose.

5. Pleasing personality - not being easily offended, realizing keeping harmony and peace is an asset.

6. Personal initiative - you must act on your plan towards your definite major purpose.

7. Positive mental attitude - this will attract what you need to achieve your definite major purpose.

8. Burning desire for your definite major purpose - this stimulates you to work your plan

9. Self-discipline - encourages you to think before you act.

10. Focused attention - helps you to think about and do what you want and off what you don't want.

11. Physical health - setting your mind to think in terms of health and not in terms of illness, moderation of habits in eating and physical activity.

12. Budgeting time and money - spending time on what leads you to your major purpose.

13. Hope - this is not a water-downed version of "wishing and hoping", but an exciting expectation of what is to come.

14. Freedom from fear - if you fear anything, you are not free and will never be rich in the fuller sense.

15. Cosmic habit force - The habits you form will lead you to success or failure. You either ride your habits or they ride you.

16. Autosuggestion - this uses creative thinking to reach the subconscious mind to sow seeds of success instead of failure.

17. Organized planning - make your plan, work it and if does not work, change it.

Can't breathe

When I am not doing my school stuff, I felt like I've lost air. I can't breathe... Is that what love is all about?

I love studying, I feel... alive. It's important, isn't it? To feel alive?

How to wear a tutu skirt?

in the green rain in the red forest, originally uploaded by tinytoadstool from dadaya.

I was contemplating on tutu since last year and found a really cheap one from forever 21 in peach. Which I really like.
But I thought to myself, "V, you're too old for tutus. And how are you going to wear it?"

Then i see this. And I say go ahead. Buy it!

I've bought it! Waiting for the parcel to arrive!

Obviously, I am not the only wanting and talking bout incorporating tutu into the wardrobe.

Deadly Female

She makes me laugh.
Her post on Sherlock Holmes (2009): http://executivehpfan.livejournal.com/76263.html

Melted Hershey Dark

I've left half a bar of dark Hershey on my study. Did the heat from the 2 notebooks melted it?

*Lick* Uuuu... Nice!
*Chocolate on lips* Eek!

He remembers!

An email came today from Huawei. I read and re-read the sender's name.

"Oh my god!"
It's from cute punjabi boy!

We met during a short 2-days company training. We didn't know each other before that but boy did we click! I even walked into the glass door a few times because of him. Up till one point he gave up and opened the door for me because I am such a klutz.

And then there was the part where another car nearly crashed into his because he did a sudden de-tour just to ask me if I wanted to go to lunch with him. How can I say no?
*Truth is, I already had a huge lunch of rice, sandwich and coffee. But I still had lunch with him anyways hehe*

We talked a lot and I kept bumping into things because I was paying a little too much attention to him.

And he remembers me... *shy*

He said I am one of the very few people he keeps in touch with. Awww... Sure, I'll marry you and we can have punjabi-chinese babies who will grow up with identity crisis. Way to go!♥

Hand puppet, huge soft doggie and piglet storage box

Was having dinner with Missy SH today. Saw a toy fair.

Walked in and picked up:
1. A frog hand puppet that my housemate said looks more like a crocodile. Damn now he is going to have an inflated ego.
2. A huge soft doggie that will sit on my lap and study with me. Just like Mr Yappy back in undergrad. Where is Mr Yappy, by the way?
3. Pink piglet (From Winnie the Pooh) storage box.

Hehe. I should take pics of these totally useless things that I buy sometimes because I can get emotionally needy.

I wanted doggie to have cross eyes and searched through the whole bin for one but I guess the QC in Singapore is pretty good. They all have normal eyes. So I have to settle.

And I can't walk through the hand / finger puppets section and not buy anything! Missy asked, "Are you mad like that? You know, talk to yourself through the puppets?"

No, lah. But I love giving them personalities and talking in different voices. Oh... I have a least 20 finger puppets... Crap where are they? I even listed their personalities down.
No no. Stop playing! Study first! Will play with them during school holidays. Yay! So happy!

When he bought me a ring

Once, very long time ago, he bought me an unicorn ring.

But I kept saying phoenix even though the unicorn was staring straight at me from my thumb.

This post from paper cut heart reminded me of then.

Desire to be the perfect housewife

No, actually I don't.

But ever since I was a kid, besides liking the boy's stuff; photography, robots, bonzai gardening, martial arts, yada yada, I like girls stuff too. Secretly, of course.

Shhh... truth is... I like to bake. No, seriously, I do. My mum is great at baking, cooking, sewing... you name it. All the traits of a perfect housewife. I like them all except cooking. I can't cook. AT ALL. My brother is a great cook, he got that. I did not.

But I like the rest of them baking and sewing. I used to help her bake and even bake quite a lot on my own. I was in Shibuya, waiting for Afiza when I saw this fabric shop run by a few old men... Gosh such BEAUTIFUL cloths!



Me: Sumimasen. This... one metre, please.
Old Man: Ichi metre, des ka?
Me: Eeer...
Old Man: Ichi metre... Wan metre?
Me: Yes, yes. Haik. Ichi metre, but make it two? Ichi metre, Ne.
Old Man: Aah... Haik! *points to pink fabric* Kawaii.
Me: *laughs* Hai! Thank you, arigato.

And oooh do I love sewing. I love picking fabrics. She will always tell me to choose something I like. One pattern can come in 3 different colours! How exciting! Then we will pop over to the haberdashery next door to pick the right buttons, piping, ribbons... Putting them against the fabrics to see if they match. Oh I love that so much.
I love watching her measure me, draw and cut the patterns. She will discuss with me, telling me why she is cutting the pattern a certain way. Make sure you cut a little more generously for the inseams. Just like Pa likes to lay out all the photographs he took on an outing and discuss them, I soak it all in. So imagine how excited I am to discover this free pattern site: Burdastyle.

Go there! Go there quick to get the free pattern and whip up some pretty things for yourself.

PS: I think nobody sews in Singapore. I just can't seems to find anything!!!


Singapore Fabric shops:

Cottons & Linens

Lists of fabric stores in Singapore and in Yellow Pages

http://www.shoppingguide.sg

http://www.fashioninfohub.com/frame.aspx?type=3

Edit: I am so going to use those fabrics to make this apron bag!

Personal life is picking up!

Everything is spinning so fast!

Personal TO DO:

1. Study - Class starts on tri-mester 2008, approx Aug. Registration & tuition fee$ on 2nd July. Time-table?

2. Tennis - the gang has graduated, so they are kinda free now. They are going to take tennis lessons. I will go with them too. Need to exercise & be in shape. Borrow racquet from Andy/Siong Boon/Steve. Approx June. After that, will book the tennis court through company Rec Club. [http://www.racquetresearch.com/]

3. Learn music - Yamaha standard flute is on sale!!! Wanted to take lessons since early this year. Hmmmm.... comtemplating.... $600 for beginner's YFL221... Tentatively June/July.



Yoriyos - The Pied Piper

Pondering: I left my soul in Tokyo

Had so much fun.
Met so many new people, I forgot how exhilarating that can be.

Now that I've been single for some years, I found being alone is quite relaxing. Walked alot. Love it. Took some nice photos. Love it again. Got lost a few times. Quite like it too. I think I am fine alone now.

I found this website too late, but vowed to do everything he recommends:
http://www.hellodamage.com/tdr/travelguide.htm

On my next trip... I will do them all. Especially the architecture one. Gotta get me that darn map he is talking about from that GA shop.

Shopping and more shopping

Been browsing around the shops in Singapore before heading to Tokyo and Bangkok for a well deserved shopping trip.

Shops I will definitely check out when I come back:

1. Pretty Fit
-the new stocks: summer sandals, pumps are to die for. A little too expensive but seriously cute!

2. Charles & Keith
-one particular sandals, approx $35.

3. Hynopsis
-cute functional dresses but too expensive in my opinion. Gotta wait for sales.

4. Miss Selfridge
-cute 60s frocks. I covet!

5. Dorothy Perkins & Topshop
-definitely gotta look at their stocks close up. Very very me! Should check out Mango too when I am back.

6. Bysi
-Frilly blouses and impossibly soft material. Hmmm... And that Miu Miu inspired skirt!

7. GG>5
A local brand with one of the best stitching I've ever seen. Great buys.
Got my favourite green/white floral dress here!

Fashionably Never

Sent a black silk "rock" skinny tie to Aaron, my fashionable, rude and mean cousin who's studying in India. Sadly, it never arrives.

We think the mailman's stolen it.
Damn. Watch out for it. Put a sack over his head and beat him up, Aaron!

Your hair is immaculate as ever. And no, blue contacts just doesn't do it for ya.

Stalking the girl of your dreams

How one thing leads to another.

As some people might know, I am so darn infatuated with Yuki Isoya. I listen to her songs everyday. And today, I searched for her images and came to Vimeo, where the co-founder of that project, Zach Klein was trying to dance to the video in his office.

I looked at his video thumbnails and gosh, the colours! It's all so beautiful. Then I saw this:
Patrick discusses the girl of his dreams...

What struck me was the colour scheme and lighting. Don't you all agree that this is the most gorgeous colour scheme ever? I want a green wall! And that red wall behind that girl too!



[By the way, I just realised you can see my view progression from the tabs in Firefox]

SO I had to watch the video. When I watched the video for the first time, I was admiring the cool green backdrop and great strobe on the right, how it creates such nice shadows, vignette etc... The video editing is quite simple but beautiful at the same time.

Then I went, "Huh?" at the part where he said he should've talked to the girl in the subway.
Wait, what is he talking about?

REWIND.

Ok. Apparently he saw this dream girl in the train and started a witch hunt for her. Eer, I would definitely be crept out! o_O
Well, somewhat... ^_^ I am just jealous. No, it's really sweeter than my projection.

He saw her in the train, didn't have the guts to talk to her. Bought a domain and setup a website with just one picture that he drew (everybody go aaaww, now), describing the encounter and what they were wearing/doing.

Patrick Moberg's illustration from his website: www.nygirlofmydream.com
Deja vu? Yes, because this is quite similar to Daniel Powter's Bad Day. And Amelie from Le Fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain. Life immitating art, huh?

So anyway, boy find girl with the help of NY-ers. Everything is well chronicled in laughing squid.

Well well well. So what is the moral of the story?

1. Take the subway/train instead of cabbing.
2. Watch people in the train instead of reading your book/tech documents.
3. See someone you fancy, setup a website and draw the whole thing out. Provided you can draw in the first place.
4. For the girls, wear flowers in your hair but try to make it elegant/sweet and not look like crazy hippie woman.

Hmm... I like flowers in my hair but, but, but I doubt I can achieve any of that.

One a more serious note though, I really think the problem is in Singapore, we just don't go out.
I, for one, love to stay in. I cab most of the time. I work the rest of the time. I try to shop after work so I don't need to go out on Sundays. I do my laundry lovingly over the weekend. I hardly meet anyone. Sounds familiar? It is mine and everyone else's story.

Hmm.... I have no idea how to make it better. But I guess... we should take things slower. Go out over the weekends, take the train, dress pretty.
The works...

My hair stylist was telling me to get my hair done for Doreen's wedding but I was skeptical.
He said, "Come on! You really should take this opportunity to doll up. Do you want to look like this all the time?"
By this he meant casual even in dresses, or I hope that is what he meant. After this story, I think I will take him up on it.

Ok. Off to drop my recycling stuff at Salvation Army.

The dead cat

Was on the way home. Feeling good about my hair treatment. Look at my hair bounce!

At the crossing one block from my home.
An insane bag lady wanted to cross too. A dead cat is in the middle of the road. Wait a minute. A DEAD cat is in the middle of the road!! He is fully intact.

Cars were zooming past it. They're always inches from squashing him. Every time a car fly past him, I scream. I've decided, I want to move him. But how? As I was trying to call my housemate for reinforcement, another lady (sane, very sane) came to my side of the road and asked aloud, "Is that cat dead? Oh my! Do you want to move it?"

I replied in high-pitched voice quickly,"Oh my god! I am so glad. I really want to move it but I don't know how!"

I forgot to breathe.

The nice, very sane lady started rummaging her bag for something to wrap the cat in, while I frantically punched at the knob to turn the traffic light red. Every time another car sped by, both of us shrieked.

Finally, the light turned yellow for cars traffic. We ran to the middle of the road, knelt down but I didn't know what to do. You see, I don't like cats. I don't touch live cats, let alone dead ones. So I put the plastic bag the very sane lady gave me over his head, while she shove the cat into the bag. The bag was too small! Oh no. A young guy was crossing from opposite the road. We looked up at him helplessly, trying to tell him the whole situation in our Minnie Mouse voices. He came over, saw the situation, knelt down and said reassuringly to us, "It's ok..." picked the cat up with both hands and brought it over to the side of the road.

I mused loudly,"Where do you bury cats here in Singapore?" The very sane lady replied,"It's ok, we can put him here at the road side." So the young guy did. We started gushing our gratitude to him but he just smiled and waved us off, like he save dead cats from the middle of the road everyday.

We started crossing the road, the very sane lady and I. The whole time we were playing out that drama, the insane bag lady didn't cross. She crossed at the same time as us.
I suppose, in her insane, dysfunctional brain; she wanted to save the cat from having it's brain crushed post-mortem but all she could do was imagine it in her head, silently.

I talked to the sane lady. I think I am in love!
She is so funny, eloquent and kind!
We talked about all sorts of things. I told her our neighbourhood is full of kind people, relating the yellow umbrella story to her.
She said,"Well you are a young, pretty girl. I am sure that is the reason!"
I laughed, "You are mean! I will just hold on to the belief that he is kind."
She said,"Oh come on, now!"

She walks really fast, though. I told her I hope to see more of her. I hope it didn't sound like I am hitting on her or anything. She replied gleefully,"I am sure we will! We are in the same neighbourhood"
I wanted to ask for her number but I am too shy.

Oh kind, funny, eloquent and very, very sane lady. I miss you, already! (^ω^)

Kind man with yellow brolly

Went for a nice dinner with Susan. We were bored. She made fun of the my tan. I did not tan, ok. It's the genes. If only she knew, how I wish I have chinese skintone and chinky eyes. She said,"You will look really funny with those eyes." I said,"Well, like Lucy Liu, eh?"

People watching... as usual. She said I dress odd. Har? Don't make fun of my comfy kappa casuals ok. They are way cool! I love sneakers! White sneakers especially.

"No no, you are wearing skirt, you should wear shoes like mine. See. Let's exchange".

And we did.

"Your jeans look better with my kappas, dammit!"

"Ah! I told ya!"





"Ok. Fine. I am walking around with mismatch shoes for the time being. Let's see if anyone notice."

Went to the toilet. Unfortunately, people did notice because the toilet is on the level of "tatami" seats of tcc. One guy actually pointed my shoes to his girlfriend.
I just act like I really wanna pee.


How funny. We are both the same shoe size even though she is 170cms at least.

I wish I have her height. But I only have her shoe size...

On the way home, I clenched my butt like she taught me to. She says it will make me bootylicious and cellulite-free. I like the sound of that!
Ouch! Butt cramps...

As I walked out of the station to my home, it was already drizzling. Dang. Do I protect my notebook or my hair?
I decided to go with my notebook. Hunched over, notebook in my chest, I walked swiftly. My mind wondered, to that time in Tokyo, when Afiza and I were walking under the drizzle. I sighed.

As I walked, I thought to myself, where are the kind people when you need them? I always share my umbrella.

Crossing the road silently. The guy in front of me turned twice. Is he wondering if we should cross? The green man has only just started blinking.

He said,"Hey, you want to share my umbrella?"

As I skipped up to him, I thought to myself, Yellow brolly! I love yellow brolly!

We crossed the road and came to a junction. I had to ask first.

"Are you going to the right?"
"Well, do you have to?"
"No, I am going left."
"Great! So am I. Stopping there to pick up coffee."
"Yay!"

We talked. I said normally I am the one to offer the umbrella. This is really good karma! Yay! Thank you, karma.

We chat away. I told him I will write about this on my blog. Maybe he regretted sharing his umbrella with me. I talked about everything except how much I really love yellow umbrella at the moment.

We parted ways at the coffeeshop. I pat him on the back and thanked him.

Thank you, kind man with yellow brolly.

As I paced, sheltered from the rain; I thought to myself, there are kind people here.
And it was a yellow brolly.

In the absence of a shopping list

I realised I love shopping. Oops.

I love shopping alone, I mean. I will go out alone, with my shopping list and find them as cheaply as I can.

But... what do you do when you don't have a shopping list? Where do we go??

Nathan with Tokko hachimaki
I wish they have Uniqlo here. I always call it Uni-glow. Afiza have to constantly correct me. Ah, that and hachimaki. When I finally got the pronunciation correct, she squealed. Hahaha. I love you, Afiza. Oh my... you will soon be Dr. Afiza. Sungguh bangga!

Oh ya, Afiza, remember when we were reading the Uniqlo newsletter and they say they are opening in NY? I took a pic of it for you.





So what do I do if:
1. there is no sales.
2. I don't have something specific to buy?
3. I can't go to the bookstore because I always end up buying books for all the wrong reasons. Even my brother got into this trend.





I go to.... Daiso! Where everything is $2. Yippee! What a fantastic place to go. There's 3 Daiso here; IMM Building, Plaza Singapura and Vivo City. Paper art, kitchen stuff, household things... yay yay!

Or if I want to be fascinated with clever organic things... Muji! Love the clever storage designs. The clean, muted, organic colours. The grape vinegar! Love the packaging, love the drink! I can spend the whole day there, looking at the things, trying to figure out what each does.... Especially at the new big one in Marina Square. So beautiful. Because everything is so expensive, I can only look... But wow! How interesting. Turns out, their products are innovative and have won a lot of awards for product design.

Many a times, I stood outside skinfood admiring the quaint, organic feel of their shop design. Then I go in and squeal like a girly girl (which everyone knows I am not) at the very quaint, very organic packaging. I will buy the products because of their packaging alone. It's that pretty.
One of my favourite things to do back in Melaka was to walk around the town admiring the quaint buildings there. Oh, did you know? Once I even went into the sikh temple near Bukit China during one of their celebrations? I was the only chinese there. I was curious. I wanted to know more. I was only 15. The sikhs in their gorgeous sarees and exquisite shirts, turban gave me rice and curry. Long story that one...

So when I am broke and without a shopping list, I shop. But for an entirely different reason. I feast my eyes on visually pleasing shops. I feed my curiosity with innovative, earthy, organic products. I make sure the hole in my pocket's not any bigger with cheap, good japanese things from Daiso. I end it all, happy that I spent it indulged in loving myself.

^_^