Wednesday, October 1, 2008

"Apparently nothing changed"

"I thought you will be happier, but you're still the same."
"Do I seem unhappy?"
"You're wrong. I am neutral. If we are to draw it on a X and Y axis, I am at the point of origin (0,0)."

Met a friend/colleague/bitch buddy for a few hours. Some people, I blur the definition.

He said a lot and I felt bad for not having much input. Not because I don't want to but those are things I've thought about a while back and I've made up my mind.

I feel bad. My friend is here! And all I can think about is computer vision maths. Oops.

Partly... I've become somewhat quiet. I can sit in the office and not talk for the whole day. Except with ND and his O gang.

He told me some of the strangest things about himself but I am not judging. I don't agree but I am not judging. I will let him vent if he needs to but maybe he just doesn't know what's gonna happen so he couldn't say much.

Then he asked, "Do you think you're talented? Wait... that's not the right choice of word. Do you think you're gifted?"

"Not so much. But I am pretty hardworking. And quite clever. So that makes up for it. *smile* I love myself."

He started talking about himself and how he is grateful for everything. I get worried when anyone starts to talk like that. Means they've given up on something.

He had this hushed sadness in him that night and I don't know what to say. I am not exactly an explosion of cheerfulness myself.

I wished I had been a real bitch and punched him so he felt physical pain. That might have done him some good.

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